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Need To Feel Alive...
lyrics
I look up at the ceiling, with that familiar feeling, of being a failure as a human being
Therapist tells me to just keep breathing, the self-loathing will soon be leaving
But here I am in the same situation every evening
But I keep on believing, that this will soon be fleeting, along with the constant nose bleeding
And every time that I’m dreaming, I always wake up screaming
No wonder why I haven’t been sleeping, I’ve been fighting these fucking demons
Going through the everyday motions like a zombie, constantly drinking coffee
With shit storms coming in bigger than tsunamis
I try to go through life like Skynyrd and be the Simplest Man
But it’s kind of hard when you have been dealt a ridiculous hand
So here I stand, as a despicable man
Not too many people understand me
Blender full of brandy, nasal full of candy, stomach full of xanies
Head full of shanties, and my girl’s drawers are full of Plan B’s
I always question my existence, and ask for repentance
Can’t blame me for my acts of vengeance
I wasn’t the one who chose this life sentence
But I still stand in the court of life as the defendant
Being controlled by an ascendance, this is never ending
I lock myself inside a static room
An oasis where all my habits bloomed
A barren wasteland where my sadness glooms
While I wait to release all this madness soon
I see that I have attracted dogmatic doom
Struggling for air trapped inside these traumatic fumes
Suffering for eternity inside the dark lit tomb
With the only light coming from the dark side of the moon
You might be feeling one drink, but I’m feeling nine
You might deal with life sober, but I’m dealing high
You might wheel one pill, but I’m wheeling five
I need to hurt myself to feel alive
A deeply moving hip-hop epic structured around voice recordings from the Aussie rapper's family, friends, and therapist. Bandcamp New & Notable Mar 1, 2023
The latest from Singapore rapper/producer enlists a bevy of gifted MCs for a rich & expansive rap LP that explores the idea of mortality Bandcamp New & Notable Feb 6, 2022
